SPORTS GUY

Further proof that Bill Simmons is the best

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Q: What's the definition of a "whitewash"? (As in "They threw a whitewash at Gonzaga the entire second half.") Some sort of zone press? Please help. I need credibility with my kids!--Jonathan L., Guilford, Conn.


SG: That's a running joke from my old Web site -- a "whitewash" happens when a team throws out five white players at the same time. You'll see it occasionally with smaller Division I schools but never with a big-time college and very rarely in the pros (San Antonio could make it happen this season by playing Udrih, Ginobili, Bonner, Oberto and Barry). The greatest whitewash of all time happened when the '86 Celtics played Bird, Walton, McHale, Danny Ainge and Scott Wedman at the same time -- the frontline was composed of Hall of Famers (and three members of the NBA's Top 50) while Wedman was a former All-Star and Ainge made the '88 All-Star Team. That will never be topped.